Oscar Wilde. Company of Theives

"We are all our own devil

We are all our own devil

And we make this world our hell."

I'm coming a bit unhinged as of late. Its alright, just the usual "my mind is so screwed" bullshit that I usually pull. I hate being the stereotypical self loathing middle class white girl, as I explained a few moments ago to Michelle, but I seriously wish I could detach my head somedays. I realllllly need to get over some body issues that I'm having. Which YES I realize they are ridiculous, but it is impossible to understand.

Moving on, before I go completely insane.

This entire summer has been spent with the usual people, or just at work. I work a lot as of late, but I'm actually enjoying my job this year. It keeps me busy, for one, and I really do love the people I work with. My boss is so amazing. She's like a mentor, and always treats me like an adult, which is nice for a change. The days, which are RIDICULOUSLY hot lately, actually bother me less and less. It doesn't hurt that I have a huge thing for one of my coworkers I guess.. But its one of those things were I realize nothing with ever come of it, and I have calmly accepted it haha.

Speaking of relationships, and my failings at them... my gay best friend is moving ahead faster than me.. its kind of disappointing. I'm SUPER EXCITED for him, yet I feel as emotionally retarded as ever. I have started writing to a certain someone, and we're finally getting past that awkwardness which follows a year long "will they, won't they" relationship shitstorm of suck... To add to my bizarre blast from the not so distant past, a certain fickle red head has started texting me after 3 weeks of silence following our near hook up. FAIL. I really should just wait until college to de-prude myself [technically I am not a prude, but a stupid 8th grade hookup CAN be revoked in my personal opinion]. SONGGGG- Lollipop by Mika.. Listen then you'll know...

College is looming overhead and I am incredibly anxious and can't wait, although I really do need to get my shit together. Buy stuff, and sign up for all my email stuff and grading systems and all that crap. I have successfully facebooked my future roommates-- that's right, PLURAL. We're in a triple and I can't wait because now I'll know TWO people. It makes the whole transition easier in my opinion. One of them is in my seminar which is exciting. I'm so nervous!

Well I'm kind of tired haha.

Peace!

Jackieeeee.